Am I a Harsh person???

“Is there something wrong with me? Is my communication with others mean? Why can I never be what they want?”

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Yes this is what I frequently ask myself every-time I fall out ‘practically’ with everybody around me, you might be asking yourself  ‘how? you seem like a pleasant person’ . It Isn’t always like that….  I am very direct and straight forward when I speak and often people misinterprets or don’t agree with what i say, and because of that I tend to not talk just to avoid hurting others, But sometimes I speak my mind and its not what others expect, I believe in being yourself all the time, even when  people call you selfish or  don’t agree with your ways of living or seeing  the world. Sometimes just expressing that you feel hurt, judged, rejected, or inferior to someone who is making you feel that way is enough to make them take not of their behaviour.

Most people just aren’t prepared for that level of honesty and openness. Its hard to talk about, or even acknowledge emotions sometimes, in other hand, you also have to be receptive to criticism.

You don’t have any obligation to be what other people want you to be, and more importantly you CAN’T always be what they want, whether you want to or not. You are a unique person and can’t help with other people project onto you.

All I have learnt from personal experience is that you will never be what everyone want because you are special to fit in their regular boring mould you are amazing in your own way. and what people say about you doesn’t say anything about you its a  reflection of them

And darling there nothing wrong with you! when it comes to communication with others there’s always room for improvement but that doesn’t mean theres something wrong with you!

until next time, keep it real my lovelies”

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Trapped In My Own Body

 

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Ever felt that you don’t belong or trapped in your body thinking that you are not what you look like and cry for help from inside? I did, and I still do. this happened during my pregnancy and after birth and still after shedding of all the baby weight.

I think it was caused by the pressure from my constant review on social media platforms, seeing all these women snap right back up, the celebrities who have 5 kids but still looking bomb, Constantly hating yourself, hiding indoors, cutting ties with friends just to avoid leaving the house.  Not to forget sleepless nights due to the newborn you just had, being tired from all the exhaustion but still trying to be fit again to fit in to your favourite dress.

I think we set irrationally high expectations for new moms and their bodies, we expect women to Snap back right back to their bodies, regardless of the pressure it puts on them. It’s not enough to literally give birth to new life, and relax and enjoy that for the little bit of time you have it. No—you have to carry the child, give birth to the child, and care for the child all while working overtime to be “hot” again.

You have to acknowledge that you may not have as much time to devote to yourself. Maybe you can’t get to the gym the way you’d like since there’s no one to help you care for your child. Perhaps you aren’t as energetic as you once were with all the late nights. It’s okay to acknowledge the changes in your life and that you need time to discover solutions.

This might be frustrating to hear from the woman who took a year and some change to finally start trying to fit back into her pre-baby wardrobe but, if anything, I’m exactly the person to give this advice. If I had accepted the added pressure and stress of trying to lose weight on top of trying to figure out how to care for a baby and my postpartum depression (story for another day)… I might not be here right now. I’m very clear on the dangers of unnecessary pressure, the pointlessness of focusing on things that aren’t intended to better you as a human being or ensure your well being. For many of us, it’s simply not a path towards wellness—it’s merely something we can do for bragging rights.

When it’s time for you to begin, you’ll know it. You’ll feel it, you’ll feel comfortable, you’ll feel ready. You’ll lay the groundwork, you’ll secure the proper support, and you’re slide into position with no pain or frustration. When you’re ready, you’ll be unstoppable. There’s no point in rushing it and cheating yourself out of valuable snuggling time. Lay back, enjoy your baby, and give yourself the gift of cute, stretchy clothes to help you stay in relax mode while you take time to recover, regroup, and readjust. And, when you’re ready to get back to working out, you’ll kill it.